| FTBL This is wrong on so many levels. But so funny.

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imported_porkchop

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Deep Thinking by Quinten Groves. :lol:

http://www.gump4heisman.com/my_weblog/2007/11/deep-thoughts-b.html#more

If the earth is always spinning, how come I am not dizzy all the time? And when I am dizzy, does that mean the earth is spinning really fast? You know, to catch up. Because if you think about it, the earth probably goes out partying every now and then like the rest of us, and sleeps in. And then, you know, before the earth knows it, it’s three in the afternoon. The Earth is so lazy. Especially the Mexican part. :lol:
 
porkchop said:
Deep Thinking by Quinten Groves. :lol:

http://www.gump4heisman.com/my_weblog/2007/11/deep-thoughts-b.html#more

If the earth is always spinning, how come I am not dizzy all the time? And when I am dizzy, does that mean the earth is spinning really fast? You know, to catch up. Because if you think about it, the earth probably goes out partying every now and then like the rest of us, and sleeps in. And then, you know, before the earth knows it, it’s three in the afternoon. The Earth is so lazy. Especially the Mexican part. :lol:

If you ever get booed by a fan, a good thing to do is take off your helmet in front of him and start crying and tell him how you always try your hardest and you don’t understand why people are so mean to you and all you want to do is be loved. Then, by the time he starts to feel bad and apologize, you can bash him in the head with your helmet, without having to take if off first. Which will save valuable seconds.

LOL!

I love Gump4Heisman...
 
My favorite. :lol:

I remember getting cheery holiday visits from my racist grandfather. He would smoke pipes and tell us that good boys and girls got visits from Santa, that flying reindeer lived all around the North Pole, and that Jews were going to steal all our money because they hate Jesus. My mother would always fuss at him afterwards. Probably because she was Jewish.
 
Isn't Groves the one who, when talking about the possibility of Tubs going to A&M, said something to the effect that, "It doesn't matter whether he leaves or goes?
 
When I was a small boy, my uncle would come over to the house for Thanksgiving. One year, I asked him what turkey was made of. He told me to stick my hand up one and find out. So I took his advice. Looking back, I think he meant a dead turkey.

:rofl:
 
To me, a football is a lot like an orange. Only you can’t make juice out of it. And if you could, eww, football juice.

:lol:
 
Hahahaaa...Funny stuff. My fave Agbarn joke is still the one about Bo Jackson being called "Bo" because he couldn't spell his real name.."Bob".
 
If you are ever getting yelled at by your coach for not listening, a good thing to do is start talking in Chinese. He won’t actually think you’re Chinese. But he will think you’re crazy. And no one cares whether or not crazy people listen to what they have to say.


BUHAHAHAHA :lol:
 
Re: Gump4Heisman

RollllTide! said:
Thanks for the link, I have been busting a gut reading other articles on this site. He is the most irreverent BAMA fan I have ever read, but genuinely funny.

Here is the link to the coaches poems.
http://www.gump4heisman.com/my_weblog/2007/09/poems-from-the-.html#more

The Funroe loss Link is also hilarious.


http://www.gump4heisman.com/my_weblog/2007/11/ulmdkmsdmlapcfm.html

The Bill Curry one was great lol!!

“Waaaaaah” by Bill Curry

Well hello, Tuscaloosa it’s your ex Mr. Bill,
I couldn’t handle the pressure so I ran for the hills.
But it wasn’t all me, you guys never gave me a chance,
I was 10-0 until I did my annual ‘Lose to Auburn’ dance.

They say bones can be broken with stones and with sticks,
But no one told me my windows would be broken with bricks.
Sure I’m over all the drama, but I keep on a' poutin,
Let’s face it, you guys should’ve just hired Bowden.
 
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