It's the bad joke thread

[doemasters]

So a man walks into my work today and has lost his the whole left side of his body.......

But don't worry he is all right now :wave:

 

[doemasters]

why did the teddy bear not eat his lunch.....

He was stuffed :dance:

 

[PhillyGirl]

Yessssss I love this thread! :hurray:

Why is it a bad idea to play poker in the jungle?
Too many cheetahs

What did the duck say to the bartender?
Put it on my bill

Who do crackers worship?
Cheesus

What do you call a lazy cow?
A bull-dozer

Why does Waldo wear stripes?
He doesn't want to be spotted!

 

[rick4bama]

How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

His foot print in the butter.

Why did little Johnny throw the clock out the window?

To see time fly.

 

[doemasters]

What does a nosey pepper do? Get jalapeño business

 

[Lance]

What did Jay-Z call his girlfriend before they got married? Feyoncé

 

[Lance]

What word is always spelled wrong in a dictionary?

Wrong

 

[PhillyGirl]

What's something red, that is bad for your teeth?

A brick

 

[doemasters]

Why didn’t the toilet paper cross the road?

It got stuck in a crack :rolf:

 

[doemasters]

Why did the stadium get hot after the game?

All of the fans left

 

[PhillyGirl]

What's grey and can't fly?

A parking lot

 

[doemasters]

How do you find Will Smith in the snow?

Follow the Fresh Prince

 

[doemasters]

Why don’t you ever see hippopotamus hiding in trees?

Because they’re really good at it

 

[Hardkore]

What is the difference between a snow man and a snow woman

snow balls

 

[Hardkore]

I sold my vacuum the other day...
all it was doing was collecting dust.

 

[Hardkore]

How did the hipster burn his mouth?
He sipped his coffee before it was cool.

 

[Hardkore]

Did you hear about thew guy who invented the knock knock joke?
He won the "no-bell" prize.

 

[Hardkore]

Did you know diarrhea is hereditary?
It runs in your jeans.

 

[doemasters]

Why was the baby strawberry crying?

Because his mom and dad were in a jam.

 

[rick4bama]

What the last thing you take off before going to bed?
Your feet off the floor.