🏈 First Openly Gay SEC Player

[bamafan4ever]

Personally, I don't give a rat's ass who sleeps with who. Why does this matter so much to people? I just don't get it.

 

[TerryP]

Not surprised by that in the least. Damn shame. He's a good player. He was ranked in the top 10 at his position recently, I believe.

Wish people would judge him by his play, not his sexual orientation.

The question is this; why did he bring it up in the first place?

If he wanted people to judge him by his play, he wouldn't have played his cards the way he has. My suspicion at this point is this was a "look at me" statement.

I'm not suggesting he hide in the proverbial closet. However, when you draw this kind of attention, and you do it purposefully, there's a motive.

What place does that have in football?

People criticize Bob Costas for constantly bringing his political ideologies into sports. Sam deserves the same criticism.

And people wonder why he's dropping in draft projections?

My sexuality shouldn't affect my position in life but I'm bringing it up which affects my position in life?!?

#canthaveitbothways

 

[Jseakin]

The question is this; why did he bring it up in the first place?

If he wanted people to judge him by his play, he wouldn't have played his cards the way he has. My suspicion at this point is this was a "look at me" statement.

I'm not suggesting he hide in the proverbial closet. However, when you draw this kind of attention, and you do it purposefully, there's a motive.

What place does that have in football?

People criticize Bob Costas for constantly bringing his political ideologies into sports. Sam deserves the same criticism.

And people wonder why he's dropping in draft projections?

My sexuality shouldn't affect my position in life but I'm bringing it up which affects my position in life?!?

#canthaveitbothways

Perhaps he brings it up because he is confident and comfortable enough in his own skin to feel he can shoulder the criticism and backlash he will likely face in hopes of opening the door for future gay/lesbian athletes to do the same. The truth of the matter is he has likely faced indirect criticism and has had to deal with pretty nasty conditions in a football locker room for most of his life. Comments being thrown around "that's gay" "fag" and plenty of other loosely tied derogatory remarks. So why bring the attention? Why not is the better question. The only way this sort of behavior will ever change is by bringing it to the forefront and not pretending it doesn't exist. It is simply taking someone with a HUGE amount of courage to do so.

 

[TerryP]

<!-- BEGIN TEMPLATE: dbtech_usertag_mention --> @Jseakin <!-- END TEMPLATE: dbtech_usertag_mention -->

"He's comfortable enough in his own skin to feel he can shoulder the criticism and backlash..."

Then why make it a public spectacle?

I'm of the opinion that what happens with my finances, with my political beliefs, and what happens in my bedroom isn't something that should be anyone's business—and I shouldn't judge, or be judged, by my own decisions.

However, if I bring it to the forefront I'm asking for people to do just that.

You say courage. I offer the question, "is he looking for support?"

If he's wanted to be treated the same as others, why is he doing this...knowing full well it's going to put him on the forefront of discussions?

This has nothing to do with football. This has everything to do with "look at who I am." I don't give a damn who he is or what he does in the privacy of his own bedroom.

I see a trend of people putting this under altruistic motivations. That leaves me with questions...it just doesn't pass the logic test.

 

[PhillyGirl]

Not sure what publicity he would be looking for beyond proving that gay athletes can and do have a place in American football. I find it hard to believe he thought this would HELP his draft stock. He's certainly gonna get attention, but he had to know what he was getting himself into.

In my opinion, it's a public spectacle because we as a society have made it a taboo to be gay in football in the first place. In order for a legitimate discussion on "why?" to take place, it needs to be kick-started in the first place. He's certainly not a martyr or anything, but this is hopefully a sign of things to come that eventually, it won't NEED to be a spectacle for a player to come out. For now, it's still an issue, and he is raising the issue by making it public. To me, it's saying, "Hey, I'm gay, and I'm a football player. If I can do it, so can you. Let's play some football." To me, that takes guts, especially in the NFL. Eventually, people won't need to discuss such matters. It will be a non-issue. But it's gotta start somewhere.

I don't care what god(s) you believe or don't believe in, who you love, who you vote for, etc. But every player has the right to make an identity for themselves, for better or worse. Some do it with proclamations of faith in God or Jesus (easily the most identifiable thing players are upfront about and discuss often in interviews). Some do it via comments on other players. Some do it with statements on how they or their team are the greatest, or how they support or don't support a cause, or comments on the military, or what bands they like, or whatever. At the end of the day, is any of that going to interfere with their play? No. But are they all valid lifestyles, opinions, beliefs, and viewpoints? Of course.

So why is it more socially acceptable for football players to discuss their faith, or politics, or musical preferences, than their sexuality?

"Coming out" as gay is no different than Ray Lewis discussing his faith, or Jon Runyan his political beliefs (which he did as an Eagle), or whatever. The difference is that THIS particular revelation of self (revealing oneself as gay) is far more socially "unacceptable" in this particular arena than those things. By bringing it to the forefront of discussion, perhaps people can get more at ease with it, get over it, and move on.

 

[Jseakin]

<!-- BEGIN TEMPLATE: dbtech_usertag_mention --> @Jseakin <!-- END TEMPLATE: dbtech_usertag_mention -->

"He's comfortable enough in his own skin to feel he can shoulder the criticism and backlash..."

Then why make it a public spectacle?

Well first he has stated that he came out in public now because he felt too many people knew and he wanted to tell/control his own story. Hard to blame the guy considering what could have been made of the story depending on who grabbed and ran with it first. When I said he was comfortable enough to shoulder the criticism and backlash I meant that he was strong enough to handle the public backlash and attention which can in turn benefit others down the road.. Obviously not everyone is strong enough to the first nor willing/capable to endure the ridicule he can/will face.

I'm of the opinion that what happens with my finances, with my political beliefs, and what happens in my bedroom isn't something that should be anyone's business—and I shouldn't judge, or be judged, by my own decisions.

I can't disagree here at all except to say that you also do not sit within a minority (even more of a minority in the sports world) therefore you would not have a reason to feel the need to bring attention to any of these areas.


However, if I bring it to the forefront I'm asking for people to do just that.

You say courage. I offer the question, "is he looking for support?"

For himself? No I don't think he is looking for support.. I think he is bringing awareness.

If he's wanted to be treated the same as others, why is he doing this...knowing full well it's going to put him on the forefront of discussions?

Because he wants to be and feels there is a need for someone to be at the forefront. Did you know that the attempted suicide rate among gay and lesbian teens and young adults is significantly higher than those of their straight counterparts? Much of this is attributed to constant ridicule, bullying, and lack of acceptance. I'm of the opinion that in this society we need a face for a cause. Hell just look at charities.. What do we do to raise awareness and raise money? We attach a celebrity to it like say Nicks Kids.

This has nothing to do with football. This has everything to do with "look at who I am." I don't give a damn who he is or what he does in the privacy of his own bedroom.

You are right to an extent.. Football created the platform in which he is now getting his message heard.

I see a trend of people putting this under altruistic motivations. That leaves me with questions...it just doesn't pass the logic test.

I'll try to lend a different example which may be more relative (and no I am not implying or trying to be funny I am simply trying to provide an example) Lets say that you belonged to a minority group, say you are impotent for the sake of discussion. Now place yourself in a locker room where the culture is very "manly" and egotistical. Derogatory slang words are thrown around with no second thought describing someone as though they are lesser or have something to be ashamed of. Instead of gay, fag, queer, homo, b*tch, etc.. they instead use terms like limp, soft, etc.. or something that pertains to you. You realize its the culture and something you have dealt with for years though its always bothered you greatly because all though they arent directly making fun of you, they are obviously linking you and those like you to something less than they are..

 

[JoshB]

I was under the impression that he "came out" publicly because there was fear it was going to be leaked out so they wanted to get ahead of it.

 

[alabama mike]

For the life of me I do not understand why someone has to "come out" and bring attention to themselves. I personally feel SOME, not all, are trying to do that with these declarations. It appears from where I sit that the gay community is trying to push their agenda and personal lifestyle on all of us.

Do I care if he is gay? No! I care that he is a good person who tries his best to make a positive contribution to our society. I wish him well, hope he gets drafted by an NFL team and has a healthy career.

 

[RollllTide!]

I just don't know how to respond in this world of political correctness gone crazy. Why does a minority of anything have to declare that they are a special minority. Sorry but I am old school. We have had gay people since the beginning of time. Because they were different they were persecuted. There was a fear of them and a hatred for them because they were different. That was a very long time ago. I knew that there was a few guys in our school that were gay. They didn't have to say it because it was not talked about but you knew who they were. This was not a hush hush issue. One of the guys was on the student council. No one made fun of him because he was a great person. We just didn't care what his sexual orientation was. He didn't care about it either. He didn't announce it but if you asked him he would tell the truth. He ended up volunteering for the Campus Crusade for Christ.

Why does anyone have to have the label of being Gay? Why can't they just have a label of a great football player or a great person. I believe the only one thing that benefits from having the label of gay, is that soap on the roap sales may go up because stupid is as stupid does, and ignorant people are always going to argue on both sides of this argument.

I am for don't ask, don't tell, because it is nobody's business unless you are personally effected by it. I don't care and don't want to know if your are gay or strait unless you make a pass at me. The PC cops and our government try to persuade us to buy into the gay movement. I don't want to influenced by either one of those groups. I am not a group lover. I like the road less traveled. There is not a gay movement in this world that has not been there all along.

Just shut up and keep your sexual orientation to yourself or your close friends only and keep RollllTide!...ing

 

[JoshB]

Why does someone have to have the label of being "black" or "white"? That might be a good question but its the way it is, because we are people. Some people see differences or someone not like you as a bad thing. Its our society, its not a good thing but its the way it is until we just start seeing each other as people not white people or black people or gay people or whatever.

One thing that does bug me is the gay community likening gay rights to that of the civil rights movement, thats just ridiculous. Gay people are not being lynched or having to drink from separate water fountains or going to different schools, neither was a whole group of gays enslaved. Yes gay people have been treated badly and some are continued to be treated badly bu thats a little ridiculous.

 

[ElephantStomp]

For the life of me I do not understand why someone has to "come out" and bring attention to themselves. I personally feel SOME, not all, are trying to do that with these declarations. It appears from where I sit that the gay community is trying to push their agenda and personal lifestyle on all of us.

Do I care if he is gay? No! I care that he is a good person who tries his best to make a positive contribution to our society. I wish him well, hope he gets drafted by an NFL team and has a healthy career.

Trying to push their "agenda" and personal lifestyle on all of us? You mean like how the religious community has been pushing their agenda on the gay community?

 

[ElephantStomp]

Why does someone have to have the label of being "black" or "white"? That might be a good question but its the face, because we are people. Some people see differences or someone not like you a bad thing. Its our society, its not a good thing but its the way it is until we just start seeing each other as people not white people or black people or gay people or whatever.

One thing that does bug me is the gay community likening gay rights to that of the civil rights movement, thats just ridiculous. Gay people are not being lynched or having to drink from separate water fountains or going to different schools, neither was a whole group of gays enslaved. Yes gay people have been treated badly and some are continued to be treated badly bu thats a little ridiculous.

It is the civil rights of our time. You're right they don't get lynched, separate fountains, schools, etc, but they're not treated fairly in the least bit. In more than half of the states in this country they can't legally be married. Also, in those same states that don't allow same sex marriage if one's partner dies they have no rights as us straight couples do, if a gay person is in the hospital and is no shape to make decisions for themselves their partner has absolutely no rights or say in his/her medical care.

So, you're right it isn't the same as what blacks went through just as it isn't the same that blacks have always been able to be married in this country while gays cannot in most states in this country, so it might not be "civil rights", but it is still civil rights

 

[ElephantStomp]

When gays are treated the same way as straight people this will be a non issue and there won't be a need for somebody to "come out" before the press breaks it first. Our society has made it a spectacle not the gays.

 

[bamafan4ever]

When gays are treated the same way as straight people this will be a non issue and there won't be a need for somebody to "come out" before the press breaks it first. Our society has made it a spectacle not the gays.

Pretty nice blanket statement Mike. I agree, all gays don't make it an issue. Then there are the Grammy's, etc. etc.......

Hard to justify the subject being crammed down everyone's throat on a daily basis, no matter if its gay rights or Tim Tebow when he was at Florida. Whatever is being force fed is what I have disdain for. I don't hate Tim Tebow but I hated the 4 year love fest that broadcaster had with him. I don't hate gay people either but I don't go flaunting to everyone that I like women with huge tits either. Tell me the difference.

Edit: BTW, I am not insulated from this issue either. I had a cousin pass away from AIDS 25 years ago and I have worked in the travel industry for 20+ years. I don't make it a habit to treat anyone different because of their sexual orientation whether I agree with the lifestyle or not. The folks that I know that are gay are treated just like straight people by the only one that counts in my case.....ME. You are not going to force people to accept what they don't want to accept, period.

 

[alabama mike]

Well said bamafan4ever. I had two friends die from aids, one I grew up with on the same street. I have colleagues who are gay. The point I was trying to make is they do not push their lifestyle on anyone. They are not my gay colleagues, they are my colleagues, end of story. The one I grew up with that died was not my gay friend, he was my friend. [MENTION=14203]ElephantStomp[/MENTION]

 

[ElephantStomp]

I wasn't trying to offend anybody, but to say that gays are treated equally is plain wrong because they're not. If gays athletes, celebrities, etc don't "come out" themselves then the press outs them and the still media outcome happens, so I don't view this guy any different than the media doing it for him.

i don't like the media attention it gets nor do I like people having to "come out" publicly, but until society accepts it fully and being a gay isn't an issue for a lot of the country this will continue.

I am sorry about your guys' cousin and friends.

 

[Brandon Van de Graaff]

I was under the impression that he "came out" publicly because there was fear it was going to be leaked out so they wanted to get ahead of it.

That is the way I understand it. It wasn't just a secret among his team and close friends. Folks in the media knew about it, as did countless others. It was going to come out (only a matter of time before someone like TMZ or Clay Travis outed him), but he and his agent wanted to control it.

 

[JoshB]

Lets be real for a second... most of us are from the dirty south, deep south, Bama... most of us (not necessarily all) were raised with the thought that being gay was wrong... not natural... Its just the way it is.

Personally, only one guy was "open" in my high school when I was growing up. Lets just say his high school experience wasn't very pleasant. I didn't take part in any of the harassment but the term "fag" was thrown around pretty liberally and he even got jumped one time. Dude eventually moved up north somewhere with his family and then came back Senior year. He seemed to not give a f*ck about anything and was alot more open about the way he was... which is fine but I gotta admit the way he went about some stuff made me uncomfortable (he would openly talk about his "experiences" the previous weekend in great detail and VERY loudly in an attempt Im pretty sure to get under peoples skins). He actually punched a dude in the mouth that called him a fag that year tho which was hilarious. Got his ass whooped in the long run but nobody messed with him after that.

Now, as for my family. I had a much older cousin that was always... lets say... flamboyant... He was alot older so we didn't hang out or anything but I did work for his dad when I was in high school every summer, and he made me work with the cousin doing service calls (on water wells). Thats when I started to think maybe he was gay, some of the comments he would make and I was pretty sure he was talking to a guy on the phone and setting up a date but I never really though too much about it. Cpl years ago his "partner" outed him to the whole family, sending pictures of them together (not anything graphic or anything thankfully) and telling all about it which was crazy. Dude hasn't come to a single family get together since which honestly is a bit embarrassing. He moved to Mobile and I haven't even seen or heard from him in like 5 years. His own daughter disowned him.

 

[jdpas29]

I look at this from several different perspectives... because i'm educated in a variety of ways. I am a believer, which means that i don't always rely on logic to discern right from wrong. Things in the world make sense to those who are "in the world". The things believers believe are often foolishness to those who do not believe. In this light, the bible clearly explains that homosexuality is not a goal in life to be sought after. It isn't the way that God himself designed us ALL to be. ALL is the important word here. There have been homosexuals since the beginning. There likely always be homosexuals. I love them the same as i love any other human being on this planet... Though i will be quite honest i don't understand how a man can watch Katniss shoot the bow and arrow and not want to make out with her. :icon_bounce: It isn't for me to fully understand a man who wants another man. I can't relate.

I'm also a biologist. In my education I have learned that many people are born with problems in the brain and/or body that make certain systems incompatible with others. In terms of sexuality, people are born every day around the world as hermaphrodites. They are born with absent or incomplete genitals. They are born with the mind of a woman and the body of a man or vice versa. To what extent and how often the less obvious problems happen isn't well known or documented. Only the most glaring and measurable physical changes are going to be documented at birth. So herein lies the use of the phrase "born that way". Yes, my fellow believers, some people are "born that way". It is an uncomfortable truth, but you need to accept it. You don't have to understand it. You're not required to.

"Why on earth would God create people with sexual deformities or derangements?" This is the question that naturally follows in the world of logic. The answer is that NO ONE KNOWS. It is not for us to know everything. It isn't our decision for people to be created in the first place. It is HIS work. I'm not called to understand how someone else was made, but I am called to love them as I love myself. Does this mean that the lifestyle that they choose and the decisions that they make should be a pattern for normal behavior in our population? NO it doesn't.

Homosexuality is a sexual deviation. That means it is off-norm. There is a reason in the animal kingdom that this is so. You can't have a population of homosexuals or that is homosexual dominant or you don't have a successful population. This is obvious. This is why i believe that even though we can teach our children what homosexuality is, we must also explain to them that it is a deviation from normal. We wish for them to have a family with a mother, father and children. Ahh!?!?! The world calls this hate. I call your bluff. It is a lie to say that I hate someone because i openly proclaim that I don't approve of their lifestyle. There are plenty of times in my life that I haven't approved of MY OWN lifestyle. :no-no: So let's not go there. I no more hate a homosexual for being a homosexual than you hate me for loving my Father God, right?

So following this thought, it is also taught as "hate" to have the opinion that marriage is only for man and woman. This is also a lie. I do not hate another human being because the marriage bond that i share with my wife cannot be duplicated for them. Marriage is a sacred bond between a man and a woman. It is a mystery. I love my wife, but i sometimes want to claw my eyes out with a pencil because of the stuff she does/says. Our bond is not reproducible between two men or two women.

"Are you saying that two men and two women can't have some sort of bond, jdpas? Cause that kinda sounds like you hatin'?"

NO! Obviously two men and two women can have bonds in their homosexuality. People have many different kinds of bonds with other people and we even have special bonds with our pets. Human beings were designed with a lot of love inside of them. It is evidenced in a variety of ways.

I personally don't care if the state wants to award homosexuals with some sort of official recognition for their relationship. The state belongs to the world. The bond I have with my wife is beyond that. Our bond is apparently also beyond the understanding of homosexuals who seem dead set on insisting that what they have with their partner is the same as what i have with my wife. It is not. It isn't biologically the same. It isn't spiritually the same. Nor is it the right of any homosexual on the planet to claim that they should be able to call their bond with their partner the same thing as my marriage... and then to claim that since i disagree i hate them. This pisses me off.

Our culture is trying to have something both ways. On one hand the "born that way" mindset says you must accept based on their individual morphology and design afforded to them at birth. But many of the same people who use this term will present homosexuality to others and even their own children as a choice you make at puberty or thereabouts. You can't have it both ways. What will end up being installed, and it's something that people take a lot of flack about for saying, is a society and culture built on preeminent permissiveness. That any and all penchants, likes, preferences as they're called, should be not only permitted but encouraged. Sexual deviations, no matter the type, should not only be accepted but indeed glorified. I refuse to, in the context of my own family, or out in day-to-day life in this culture, pretend like sexual deviations are to be glorified. It is illogical to do so. It isn't productive for our species. But most importantly, the Father knows what's best for me and my family. I lean on His description of the family and I lean on His type of love to make good order of things where logic fails.

I don't wish to offend anyone with these statements. I also am not looking to arouse one group against another. I hope that my comments can be viewed with respect from the button-mashers on this board. I do love you all. :very_drunk:

As far as this player "coming out". I hope that the way he plays ball is what the scouts care about. Otherwise, what have we become where even the sacred field of football is smeared with sex talk. Let's keep football clean. There's no sex in football. :td:

 

[Kirk Van de Graaff]

First off, I don't care if they are gay or not. I don't watch football to see if they are gay or not. I don't care if they tell people they are gay or not. I dont care if the straight people are straight. I don't care if they are white, black, brown or green. All I care is that they wear that Crimson jersey and leave their actions on the field. I don't want to know their personal lives. Truth be told, its none of our business anyway.