🏈 Tunsil 7 game suspension, returns against Texas A&M

[252BAMA]

Plagiarized word for word via copy-paste from another board. Too good not to spread.

"I just got back from consulting my source at Elmwood Cemetery and TStud told me that the NCAA has finished the investigation of the alleged improper use of rental cars from Cannon Motors and actually there is no problem here. It appears that Tunsil's mother took her 1988 Yugo to Cannon Motors for an oil change and Cannon Motors gave her a loaner car three years ago for her use while they changed the oil on her 1988 Yugo. Cannon Motors lost the plug on the oil pan of the Yugo and they have been searching for a replacement plug for the last three years. Periodically Tunsil's mother will bring the car back for a replacement. Tunsil's mother told Cannon Motors that she needed three loaner cars for the Yugo, because she needed to be sure she had a way to get her boy to school and her boyfriend to work, so Cannon Motors recognizing their fault in losing the oil plug complied with the reasonable request.

This week, since Tunsil will be reinstated late, Tunsil will take his twenty-four hour test drive in a new Buick to Tuscaloosa and he wants to know where he can park the loaner car.

Since Tunsil did not know the arrangement between Tunsil's mother and Cannon Motors, there is clearly no NCAA violation in this matter. The NCAA will probably go ahead and reinstate Tunsil since he knew nothing of the arrangement.

The Tire man strikes again.

My information is 100% accurate and can be verified by my source, if you are willing to go talk to him. Beware no recent person that has conversed with him has ever returned and we know that he is not up there.

For those that take me seriously, this is another work of fiction, as we know the NCAA would never make such a ridiculous finding of fact.

SMoore43 is my confirmation source for this information."

 

[planomateo]

LOL, Tunsil in a Yugo, I need to see a picture of that.

 

[rick4bama]

Thanks!! I needed that today!

 

[jdpas29]

Cancel the Tunsilectomy then. I guess they won't have any excuses after the loss.

 

[Bamabww]

Bummer. That damn barner luck has spread across the state line to Oxford.

Agree @252BAMA that was too good not to share.

 

[planomateo]

Interesting, he's coming back against Texas A&M.

NCAA Decision on Laremy Tunsil Announced

OXFORD, Miss. -- On Monday afternoon, the University of Mississippi was notified by the NCAA that Laremy Tunsil will be suspended for a total of seven games and will return to competition on October 24.

The University initially withheld Tunsil from competition at the start of the season as both the NCAA and the University examined several alleged improper benefits. During the course of the process, it was determined by the NCAA that Tunsil received impermissible extra benefits that included the use of three separate loaner vehicles over a sixth-month period without payment, a four-month interest-free promissory note on a $3,000 down payment for purchasing a used vehicle, two nights of lodging at a local home, an airline ticket purchased by a friend of a teammate, and one day use of a rental vehicle. In addition, it was determined that Tunsil was not completely forthcoming when initially questioned by NCAA investigators regarding the loaner vehicles. He later corrected his account and since apologized.

As part of his reinstatement conditions, the NCAA imposed a seven-game suspension, ordered Tunsil to pay the value of the extra benefits to a charity, perform community service, and he will also make the vehicle down payment.

Statement from Laremy Tunsil:

I take full responsibility for the mistakes I made and want to thank everyone for their continued support. I want to apologize to my teammates, coaches and the entire Ole Miss family for how my choices affected our program. This was a learning experience, and I'm looking forward to being back on the field with my team and redeeming myself. The last 10 months have been a physical and mental battle for me, but I love playing this game more than anything else. I want to be here for my teammates who are depending on me to finish what we started together.

Statement from Hugh Freeze:

We have been supportive of Laremy throughout this process, and we are thankful he can return to competition starting with the Texas A&M game. More important than his football ability is his character, and I am confident that Laremy will grow from this experience and continue to be a positive member of the University and our football team.