2015 SEC Football Championship Game Broadcast
Official Transcript of Gary Daniels and Vern Lundquist’s commentary at the beginning of the broadcast
Vern: Welcome to Atlanta and the SEC Championship, as east division winner Florida takes on west champion Alabama. You may wonder why we’re here an hour early, but the outcome of the game may be decided even before kickoff.
Gary: Right Vern, we’re watching for the Chief to enter. He’s in Atlanta with three buddies, and if he has his lucky, away-game Jay Barker, autographed jersey, that’s probably all we need to know about the outcome of this game.
Vern: Some explanation is probably in order, partner.
Gary: Well, it’s simple really. If he wears the jersey, the outcome of the game can change rapidly. He wore the jersey late in the UT game this season, when he needed to. Go back to 2011 when Bama lost to LSU. He didn’t wear it. Attended the Texas A and M game, with Manziel, didn’t wear the jersey… The evidence is compelling. He was out of town for the Kick Six game too.
Vern: We can’t forget that one.
Gary: No, by all means. We need to mention that game every chance we get.
Vern: So Chief must have the jersey, or-
Gary: Right, Vern. Epic stunner tonight.
Vern: Wait… He’s here…And…
Gary: My, I don’t see it…anywhere…
Vern: He’s carrying a bag, but that could be from the Fanfare.
Gary: If the jersey is peeking out of the bag, we might… I just don’t see it…
Vern: Let’s go down to the field with Allie LaForce. Allie, they’re in the lower section near the
end zone, can you see the Chief?
Allie: Vern and Gary, I was just talking to Florida coach Jim McElwain, and he has watched for the Chief for over an hour. It’s an important event. He knows how crucial this decision is for his team. With the jersey, McElwain admits the Gators have no chance. Back to you guys.
Vern: Thanks, Allie. Gary, has the Tide won, I mean ever, when he didn’t wear the jersey at some point?
Gary: Of course, but if this game’s close, that’s been the deciding factor.
Vern: There’s the Chief, and is that, uh, one of those…
Gary: Yeah, he’s got one of the big souvenir cups. Probably tea. And, one of those pretzels. I love those.
Vern: They’re tasty-
Gary: Vern, sorry to interrupt, but Chief’s bag just tumbled over a little, into the aisle. Was that the sleeve of a white jersey? I couldn’t tell.
Vern: It could have been some sort of paper. Let’s see if we can get a look on the slow-motion replay..
The scene shifts to the Chief and his buddies. As the Chief tries to adjust his snacks, his bag tilts, and sure enough a sleeve appears to protrude from the bag. The shot freezes and for several minutes both announcers debate whether or not it’s the jersey. The evidence is inconclusive since the Chief may have simply bought a souvenir shirt.
Vern: We’re going to break for a commercial. This looks to be a nail-biter. We’ll be back.
The broadcast breaks with the frozen shot of the shirt-sleeve poking from the Fanfare bag. The commercials end, and immediately Vern announces breaking news and footage appears from a melee outside the Georgia Dome.
Vern: Let’s go to Allie LaForce for this update. Allie?
Allie: Vern, Gary, I got tired of waiting on you two twits to decide if Chief brought his jersey and went up in the stands to ask him. The story got even bigger. Here with me is the man himself, the Chief. Can you tell us what happened?
Chief: Sure, and hi Allie. Is that real platypus skin?
Allie: (smiling) It is.
Chief: Amazing. Anyway, so I decided to bring the jersey. But, as you know, it’s autographed, and I’ve become deathly afraid of something happening to it.
@Birdman37 got me worried about it initially-
Allie: Who?
Chief: A guy on our board, RollTideBama, the best forum anywhere. Anyway, so I decided I would bring the jersey but protect it and take it out only if needed. The problem was…I decided to bring it in a locked briefcase. When I got to the gate, the workers started screaming to “get down”. Me and my guys started to boogie and dance before we realized they thought it was a bomb in the briefcase. Officers tackled me and my buddies. A bomb sniffing dog came over and I gave him part of a ham sandwich I had left over from lunch. The officers didn’t like that at all-
Allie: But the shirt, what about the shirt?
Chief: Well, they found the
jersey. I had to tell them all about the superstition. They finally let us go.
Allie: So, you brought the shirt.
Chief: Well, I really worried about something happening to it at that point, so I thought about taking it back out to my truck, and-
Allie: Dammit, you men and your football. Did you bring the shirt or not?
Chief: Yeah, I have it right here.
Allie: Back to you Gary and Vern. (
begins muttering to herself as she walks away) I’m not doing this again. I’m better than this. ‘Take the job,’ they said. ‘It’ll be fun,’ they said….
