Transcipt of the NCAA call.
(video opens up of me telling people what I am about to do)
Me: Alright guys here's what I am gonna do, Hahaaaaaaa. I am bout to call the NCAA compliance department and I've got their number right here, it's 317-917-6222, a buddy of mine give it to me and I'm going to get to the whole bottome of this Cam Newton thing. I'm gonna found out how..how legal..or how they've got away with what they got away with. Anyways let's dial 'em up here.
(picks up the phone)
Me: It's 1.. 317...917...6222
(put's on speaker phone)
Me: I don't know if y'all can hear this or not.
(you hear the dial tone and the other end picks up. They didn't say anything at the time so I thought I had been disconnected.)
Me: Well I believe they've hung up on us...Hello?
Todd: Good afternoon this is Todd with the NCAA, how may I assist you this afternoon?
Me: Hello Todd my name is Mr. Ray Zens (i hold up a box of Sun-Maid raisins and laugh at the camera)
Todd: I'm sorry sir, what was your name?
Me: Ray Zens, R-A-Y Z-E-N-S (I hold up the box of raisins again)
Todd: Yes sir, how may I help you?
Me: Yeah, I was just wondering, I've got a boy who's uhhh... He plays high school football, and he's real good, and I was just wondering, I was thinking about calling up other colleges and like... well i just wanted to know how.. Well I don't want to cross the lines..how to make it legal if I can like shop him around and uhh and he ain't gonna know about it now, but is that ok if I do that? Like shop him around and like send him to the school that's the highest bidder or som'n?
Todd: Sir you realize this is the NCAA correct?
Me: Yeah I know, I'd like to make it compliant with you guys. Now I don't want to get him in trouble now, I want him to play football, now he's good! I just though I could shop him around.
Todd: Hold one second Sir. What was your name again, sir?
Me: Ray, R-A-Y, Zens, Z-E-N-S, I'm from Fairhope, AL.
(I hold the box of raisins up for a third time)
Todd: Now sir you realize this... this is an offense that you are trying to committ.
Me: No.... see... He..No, it shouldn't...not if he don't know about it right? Now he ain't gonna know about it, I am just doing it secretly and he won't ever know. It will just be me and you know the college.
(I then whisper into the camera "Cam Newton Sucks" while Todd pauses)
Todd: Sir hold on just one second.
(they place me on hold and some Christmas music starts playing.)
Me: They've put me on hold. Oh look at that, listen to that music. (happy holidays is playing in the background and I start dancing around lip syncing it)
Todd: Mr. Zen?
Me: ZENS! Yes, sir?
Todd: We are not going to be able to help you in this matter, Also to let you know, this is a very very serious..serious offense that you are talking about. I would highly recommend that you don't do what you're considering doing.
Me: So basically what you're telling me if..if..if I do this and.. and ..you know, it comes up illegal or something that it could jeopardize my son's future in football ?
Todd: Yes, that's exactly what I am talking about, also , with some possible legal..legal issues as well on your part, sir.
Me: Ok..Ok, so I don't need to do this right? I don't need to shop him around?
Todd: Sir I'm not going to be able to help you in this matter.
Me: Ok, and what was your name?...Todd?
Todd: My name is Todd, Yes, sir.
Me: Ok, thank you Todd and ROLL TIDE!! Well there you have it, folks.. There you have it. The proof's in the puddin. HAHAAAAA
That's it. Hope this helps some. I didn't know I stuttered as bad as I do until I started writing this script. I tried to include everything in here so you could paint a picture with the words. RTR
